Many moons ago in 2001, when the Boulder household was flush with monetary means (i.e., pre-ivf), I had a certain itch to upgrade a previous Apple laptop (G3 Bronze).
I lusted for the newer, faster model. I wanted to break up with my older laptop badly. The track pad would overheat when I used it, and when you are in a hurry, having a cursor that doesn't move, or a screen that won't scroll becomes a hassle. The hard-drive was overtaxed. And then there was the thing with the logo. Yes, the logo. Some designer at Apple placed the logo so that it was "face up" when closed on a desk top (not a frequent happening), but "upside down" when open and glowing (a very frequent happening). Drove me crazy, that lack of attention to detail. I mean, how the heck did that get to market that way?
So, I threw caution to the wind and happily ordered away. I cringe now when I think of how many vials of gonal-f that decision would be in present day ivf-dollars.
When it arrived I remember marveling at the shiny titanium and carbon fiber case, and the bright "mega-wide" display. It wasn't just gorgeous. It was sexy. Seriously. It measured 1 inch thick, and it was smaller and lighter than anything Apple had previously had on the market. I know, because I'd had everything from the very first Macintosh to several incarnations of laptops and desktops along the way since the mid 80's. It had a dvd drive too, and I thought that was the coolest thing. My husband's previous PowerBook had had one, and we'd loved it on long trips, and I envisioned a good life for this computer and me.
Along the way, the dvd drive has not gotten as much use as I would have thought, the drive itself is in a horribly designed location (just underneath my right wrist, where my arm sits when I type) so it has a kind of stress-fault, and doesn't spin discs well. The power cord has blown out twice now, and it is finicky now - hard to keep it actually plugged in and charging. (But better than my G3, which actually caught fire - thankfully with me sitting there with it, so nothing was hurt.) The left side has been cracked (um, titanium & carbon fiber - not so strong after all) since before I can remember.
It has had minor upgrades thanks to a loving husband who is technically minded - some memory here, and a new hard drive (size DOES matter) there.
My life and computer, circa 2001 seemed so full of potential. My how things have changed for the poor computer and me.
But all in all, it was an excellent choice, and it is still my constant companion. My lifeline to like-minded people. To friends who, like me, became hard to reach on any phone, be it cell or land line. I am always on the move with this computer. It is at my bedside at night. It goes to work with me each day - sadly only very few days do I actually get to open it up and use it as the business runs on PC's (not my choice, obviously!).
So, imagine my surprise when a week ago Saturday, I reached for said beloved computer and the sleek titanium case which I've become so adept at handling slipped. And fell. All 5.3 pounds of it. On my big toe. The corner of it, to be exact, hit the top of my joint at the base of the toe. It made me nauseous immediately - never a good sign, and because of the force and placement, it broke a vessel. A large one, apparently. It was black within seconds.
I've got a RX for an x-ray, but I haven't had a chance to get to the center. I kind of passed it off as, "Oh, well, I'll limp around and things will be fine," but a friend pointed out how screwed up a toe joint could make my life if it doesn't heal properly, etcetera. Orthopaedic surgeons' surgical assistants can be really graphic - and not in a good way.
So, for the first time in ages, I have to see a doctor for something that is not related to my infertility. Well, except for the part about the reason why I was picking up the computer in the first place. How weird is that?
I just hope that when I do go, I only take off my shoes, and not everything from the waist down.