Imagine my surprise when in the midst of feeling pretty angry about being married to a man with such an insensitive idiot (ass?) for a father, my husband really managed to come through for me and us.
How so you ask? By surprising me with a long planned night away from the ever-present FIL by booking a room for us overnight at a fantabulous hotel that I love! Am I a lucky woman after all or what?
We had a wonderful room overlooking the South pool, and had a $100.00 food and beverage credit incorporated into our room rate which made for decadent pool side drinking and dining on Saturday evening and Sunday morning and afternoon. Do you know how many 8.00 drinks you can have in a 24 hour period with a $100.00 credit spurring you on? Ha! We really, really couldn't afford this right now, but damn it was great. I've got a few pictures that I'll upload later tomorrow for you to see.
My husband had to go to our business for the morning on Saturday, leaving me to prep the place for the "prospective buyer's" pleasure, and I have to say, I was feeling pretty freaking put out by the entire notion of going out of my way for the old bastard. BUT, I decided to put a different spin on it and that was to think of it as tiding up for US. So that we'd be able to enjoy a relaxing Sunday at our place without frantically doing laundry, running the dishwasher, etc. And it was worth it when he came back up to the place with keys to the room for us to escape to! The icing on the proverbial cake, however, was when he told me he'd painted a pathetic picture to his father about how he'd "ruined" our plans to "get away" for the weekend. Got to love a man who can think on his feet. We'd never planned to be away, but his father didn't know that. I'm sure he didn't care, but if he felt a fleeting pang of guilt, it was worth it to me personally.
We also had a lot of laughs poolside over my FIL's delusional mindset which leaves him believing he is going to sell his home for the price at which we now know it is being advertised. I'm not going to put the figure here, because it is just too laughable, and let's simply leave it that pigs will fly first, ok? He wouldn't disclose the price when my husband first asked, and then gave an outlandish figure when my husband said he was just curious. So we did what any enterprising sleuths would do and looked at MLS databases on the internet, and found nothing. So then we went to plan B and sure enough, when we called from a friend's cell phone (to usurp Caller ID) to ask the listing agent, the number wasn't what FIL had told my husband - it was lower (no surprise there - lying sack of shit), but it was still insanely high compared to what other, nicer places are being listed at.
His realtor is blowing wind up his skirt with tales of what the house will fetch, and the FIL is buying it hook, line and sinker. We know how the game will play out. The realtor will show it a few times, and then prod FIL to lower it to sell it, and FIL will follow their advice. They will move the property, because what do they care, it is all about the churn for them. FIL doesn't see that, and will lose the chance to see the increase in appreciation if he simply held on to it in the market. We can't understand why he isn't considering a reverse mortgage in our hot market, but the realtor has him snowed - sell now or you won't be able to when the "bubble" bursts. (The bubble isn't going to burst - it may slow, but it won't burst.) And, by the way, how exactly do you plan to sell a house without putting it into the MLS system? Isn't that the entire point of having a realtor? If you don't care about MLS listing, why wouldn't you pass on the 7% fee and do a "for sale by owner?" The man is so out of his league. We've had 7 addresses since we've been married - you think he'd ask us for advice? No. The man knows all and needs help from no one.
We've been wondering if the "For Sale" stuff was a passive aggressive way of getting us to move out, or what. But we now know he's serious because he's spent money cleaning up the place (but only very very superficially). Case in point - FIL finally decided to have gardeners here this week to clear all of the over growth out. Earlier this summer he wanted us to split the landscaping bill (we refused) because he blames our 2 dogs for the change from xeriscape to knee high grass dead grasses (and not the 11 inches of rain in January and February), so it is at least looking better, but the house has nothing going for it that will earn it the price he wants. Let's be clear too, that whatever he does manage to get for it will be spent so fucking quickly by his girlfriend in the wings that it will make his head spin. After months of being unsupportive of him, and telling him she was done with him unless he sells, she's now been up here 4 times in the past week. The last time being the final day the gardeners where here on Friday.
Interesting tidbit - we've been very certain FIL has been over here snooping around, and my husband had my car down at the business on Friday (so there was no evidence of my presence here that day). Around 3:30pm, the doorbell rings, and I see out the blinds (that are now always down) that FIL and GF are surveying the "cleaned up" back yard. (Cleaned up means weed-wacker used by unskilled workers, and then hap-hazardly raked away to leave fine gravel with dried grass remnants as the ground covering - which by the way, is now effectively a seeding waiting for a bit of rain to germinate the same wild grass all over again.) Only about one hour before I'd let my beloved dogs out and one had left the most gorgeous (and huge!) crap in the center of the "cleaned up" back yard. So, I open the door with dogs barking like there was a serial rapist at my door (G-d I LOVE those dogs!) and my FIL is caught ENTIRELY off guard, and says, "Oh, I didn't know you were here." And thankfully my phone was ringing when he said, "Never mind." So I closed the door and left FIL + GF there to survey the site.
Want to know what I think? I think they were coming over to walk through and see what they were going to demand we clean/fix up. And I caught them! It happened to be my husband on the phone, so I told him what had just happened so he called FIL immediately and asked ever so innocently, "What's up?" My FIL got pissy and said, "There is a pile of crap in the back yard." Husband asked, "So?" FIL said, "I thought we weren't going to have that anymore." Yeah. We've decided not to let the dogs relieve themselves any more. I have to point out that my husband, even with his completely insane work schedule always makes at least 2 passes around the yard each day with a pooper-scooper to clean up, so it wasn't like the mess wasn't going to be picked up the moment he came home, you know? My FIL is of the mind set that once the yard was neatened, the viewings of his home would happen instantaneously. Yeah. You cleaned the back yard, so everyone will be coming over in droves now. It makes me laugh out loud even thinking about his supposition.
Husband was very "what EVER" about it, and FIL asked when we were moving out and my AMAZING guy said, "We are working on it, we'll be gone soon enough" and left it vague, just to piss FIL off. I love him. We totally know when we are leaving and where we are going, but we are not telling him anything. I mean, why would we? The minute we say one date, he'll be breathing down our necks to be out that very day. And we are going to do it on our schedule, at our own pace. Believe me, we want out ASAP, but it isn't realistic to think we can make it happen in one day, so why let my FIL think he can run the show?
So, the point of all of this is to say life is all about perspective sometimes, right? And in honor of that thought process, I've elected to go with my husband's opinion, and have decided that this past year was actually unlucky number 13, and now consider this to officially be our 14th year that we experiencing.
Pretty amazing what a little perspective can do for one's outlook. That and a few piña coladas can even make you forget cycle day 1.